"Don't Poke the Bear: A Bowling Story"

[Aslan]

Recently, I had an experience I thought I would share here...rather than in my Scores thread...because it's not really so much about my scores, as it is about the mental/competitive side of the game...and how bowler/team behaviors can help/hurt them.

Now, quick backstory:
- subbing in this league
- subbed a lot with them last season, had a 650+ series once, averaged 182 over 30 games.
- two weeks ago, first time subbing with them this season, I rolled a 571 series (201-222-148)...with the 148 saving me in terms of average.
- Going into tonight, I was carrying a 190 average from the series above. Thats roughly 10 pins higher than my current sanctioned average in two other leagues.

So, I subbed Tuesday...rolled okay on Wednesday...I got a lesson tomorrow...I was running late...so I almost didn't go over to the alley to sub. But, I bowled well this week and I like bowling when I'm bowling well...so, I rushed over there. Just as I was buying a drink, I got picked up immediately by a beginner team...I had subbed with them before, nice guys.

Things started badly, because I didn't know "who" I was subbing for. The team said "Chris", but there were two "Chris's" on the team. The guy at the desk said, "Oh, it must be this one because he isn't marked as paid. So, I return to the lane.

The team we were facing was in first place in the league...four solid bowlers. The anchor, is an older bowler that used to be a league officer in my old Monday league. He was nice and an above average bowler...but a bit 'curmudgeony'. Just, a kinda bowler where they know the rules, they know the etiquette, and they expect everyone else too as well. My kinda bowler. Well, he enters the names in...then, as I begin my approach...no warm-up/practice...my teammate tells me I was actually subbing for the 'other Chris'. So, now the other team's anchor sits down and re-does it. He said it was no big deal...and I apologized for the mistake...but I still felt like he was a little annoyed.

First 3 shots....strike, strike, strike...
When I got up for the 4th frame, I could sort of 'sense' that the other team wasn't too happy. I struck again...then again.

By the 6th frame, it was apparent that I was literally CARRYING the entire team I was subbing for. Two of the bowlers were on a sub-100 track...the other...somewhere below his average. All I needed to roll...to equal the player I was subbing for...was a 209 minus my handicap (31pins)...a 169. One more strike, and I was almost guaranteed a score in the 170s. I struck again.

Now, at this time...the other team was visibly annoyed. One of their players, in particular, was shaking her head and whispering comments to other players on her team. I understood 'why' they were upset...a team subbed a 190 average bowler for a 159 average bowler...and now the sub is disrupting the points standings by stealing a game...that the other team certainly didn't deserve. But, I'm not really a 190 bowler either...I was more worried the night would go the other way...and I'd struggle to get anywhere near 190 for even one game.

TO BE CONTINUED

[Aslan]

...CONTINUED...

So, 7th frame...I step up...push the ball too far out...end up with a single 2-pin. I converted it...but I noticed after my first shot...that same lady on the opposing team...was quietly clapping and doing a little dance. Not 'great' bowling etiquette.

Now, as the title of this short story eludes to, the actions of the bowlers, both on your team and on the opposing team, can often change the dynamics of the game. In my situation, I just had my hopes of my first sanctioned 300-game dashed. I just made a bad shot. This is where my mental weaknesses creep in...questioning my skills, or my line, or my coaching, or my equipment. Making a bad shot or a disappointing result...can often derail me.

But, as I got up for the shot in the 8th frame...I thought to myself, "I'll give that ***** something to clap about." Strike. One of my better shots of the night.

Now, 9th frame, I was back on the left lane...where I had left that 2-pin. I kinda felt like it was time to ball down to the Innovate...but I didn't want to switch off a bad shot...threw the ball, shot seemed okay...ball just seemed to die...left a 2-8 sleeper. I tried a little 'too hard' to pick it up and clipped the 8-pin off the back. No clean, 250+ game for me. But, in the 10th...I remembered that lady on the other team...and I started "bowling angry"...strike, strike, strike...for a 247. It wasn't enough to win...thank goodness...or there'd have been a hangin.

In Game 2, my teammates stepped up their game...but I lost my line early as I tried out the Innovate. Once I found my line again, after the ball change, I was back to striking. The team did their job and my 209 was enough to help.

In Game 3, it seemed like every little thing was bothering our opponents. Our team wasn't always "ready-bowling"...and the more often it happened, the more times it happened, the more annoyed their team was getting. It was primarily the one lady...the rest of the team just seemed to be more on the receiving end. But Game 3 is also the game I usually take out the Scandal Pearl...which I MUST admit...has thus far been a MONSTER in terms of length and snap. Three strikes, opened on a baby split, three more strikes, opened on single 6-pin in the 8th (bye bye 700 series), then doubled before chopping a 2-4-5 in the fill frames...for a 218. All I needed was a mark in the 10th to take 2 of 3 points.

Like I mentioned in my scores thread; most people bowl their best when they are relaxed. Opponents may think that getting under their skin will be helpful and have a negative effect on their game. But, sometimes that can backfire. I came into that night late, rushed, unprepared, and sensitive to the 1st place team's concerns/situation. But, in part due to their own behavior...I had my best season since October 2015 and my second best sanctioned series ever.

They also took issue with our #3 bowler. He is a newbie and I 'think' that he thought the rule was...he couldn't go on the approach when the opposing player is up there. So he waits until they are done (with both shots). He wasn't doing it to "slow play" or cause trouble. He's a very nice, old guy...he just didn't know the rule. But that other team...they let EVERYTHING bother them. As a result, they ended up suffering the defeat. They put all the pressure on themselves, let every little thing bother them. then, on top of that...they poked the bear.

[1VegasBowler]

Well done!

While I'm not one to sub, and haven't, I had a team this year do one of the things you mentioned that was very similar.

Final game and in the 10th frame it was very close. All I needed was a mark for us to get the win and a sweep of the night.

As I got on the approach, I could hear a couple of them talking about how I needed to get either a gutter ball or a big split in order for them to win, and since they were loud enough for quite a few people to hear, I just stopped my approach, put the ball down on the return, looked at them, laughed and said "Really"!?

Personally, I love being the anchor and being in pressure situations. And whenever I'm nervous, I tend to bowl my best. If I'm calm and relaxed, I don't bowl all that well.

To make this short, I struck out in the 10th. But after the third one I yelled out BANG, looked and pointed at the other team and said to them "so much for that gutter ball or big split"!

I am not one to talk trash while I'm bowling because it can backfire on you quickly. But this one time I had to send a message, by, as you said, don't poke the bear, because they sure did.

[chrono00]

Well done!

While I'm not one to sub, and haven't, I had a team this year do one of the things you mentioned that was very similar.

Final game and in the 10th frame it was very close. All I needed was a mark for us to get the win and a sweep of the night.

As I got on the approach, I could hear a couple of them talking about how I needed to get either a gutter ball or a big split in order for them to win, and since they were loud enough for quite a few people to hear, I just stopped my approach, put the ball down on the return, looked at them, laughed and said "Really"!?

Personally, I love being the anchor and being in pressure situations. And whenever I'm nervous, I tend to bowl my best. If I'm calm and relaxed, I don't bowl all that well.

To make this short, I struck out in the 10th. But after the third one I yelled out BANG, looked and pointed at the other team and said to them "so much for that gutter ball or big split"!

I am not one to talk trash while I'm bowling because it can backfire on you quickly. But this one time I had to send a message, by, as you said, don't poke the bear, because they sure did.


Guess it depends on how they say something like that. I'll say things like that to my team sometimes. Maybe something like "well if they dump these two in the gutter we have a shot!" But usually if i, saying that it's a in a sarcastic self deprecating style cause I no the 195 and 210 average guys going up there aren't gonna dump consecutive balls in the gutter lol.

[Aslan]

I think, like golf or shooting pool or many sports, each person has a certain definition of etiquette.

When you watch the PBA...all it takes is a camera man to itch their nose...or a guy in the parking lot passing gas...and someone like PDW will throw a toddler fit. On the other end of the spectrum, there are many house/league bowlers that barely follow even basic etiquette. And everyone has their pet peeves...too many balls on the rack, powder on people's shoes, slow bowling, excessive celebrating, etc...

I like to think I'm pretty easy going compared to most bowlers. Like golf, I know the basic etiquette and I follow the stuff that is generally important (not walking on someone's line or talking in their backswing)...but ya ignore alot of the other stuff. But, for me...I draw the line at "applauding failure". I KNOW...the other team is hoping I fail. Not because they're mean people....it's a sport...it's a competition...only one team can win (unless it's a tie). It's okay to hope I fail...cross your fingers...say a prayer...whatever. I'm hoping they fail! But, I still congratulate them on their good results and I don't mock them or celebrate when they fail. To me, that seems too aggressive. But, everyone has different pressure points...

[JasonNJ]

Here's my poking the bear story. My Weds Night Mixed league my team was in 2nd place and it was position night so we were playing the first place team. This is more of a social league so the first place team are 3 bad bowlers and 1 so so bowler but have huge handicaps. We spot them about 120 pins. Anyway, I had a pretty good night that night, I had a 662 series so I was striking a lot. Unfortunately my teammates had off nights and the other team they all bowled about 25 pins above average which really isn't that hard to do when most of them are 115 averages. Anyway, in the middle of the 3rd game, I crush the pocket and leave a 7 pin wobbling but it stays up. I hear on the approach next to me, stay up, stay up. I turn around and a guy from the other team carrying a 117 average is begging for the pin to stay up.

Just common etiquette you don't root out loud, right? Anyway, that burns me up and again I bowled well but my team didn't and we lost 5 of 7 points that night. But from some quirk of the schedule we bowled them again in 2 weeks and before we bowled I told everyone on my team about the dude and we crushed them that night. We took 7 points, took over first place and we won one game by 230+ points. It was a really satisfying night.

[J Anderson]

Just common etiquette you don't root out loud, right? .

What planet are you from?

Rooting is by it's nature vocal and demonstrative. I admit that it's not very classy to root for something bad to happen to your opponents, and it can often inspire your opponents to kick your butt, but it's part of sports. When I started bowling, if you left a pin rocking, the other team would yell "Stand up you coward!"

I admit that I try to avoid "poking the bears" when I bowl. This is mainly because I don't want to get anyone more fired up to do well against me than they already are. Yet it's sad to think that we've become so politically correct and that our egos have become so fragile that no one is allowed to say anything negative.

[1VegasBowler]

What planet are you from?

Rooting is by it's nature vocal and demonstrative. I admit that it's not very classy to root for something bad to happen to your opponents, and it can often inspire your opponents to kick your butt, but it's part of sports. When I started bowling, if you left a pin rocking, the other team would yell "Stand up you coward!"

I admit that I try to avoid "poking the bears" when I bowl. This is mainly because I don't want to get anyone more fired up to do well against me than they already are. Yet it's sad to think that we've become so politically correct and that our egos have become so fragile that no one is allowed to say anything negative.

Stand up and fight is what I've always said...lol

But I keep it to my teammates, especially when it comes to the better bowlers.

But, I will give people credit when somebody is rolling perfect. They leave that bowler alone in the hopes they get that perfect game.

Even though my perfect game was killed with a ringing 10 pin in the 2nd frame, everybody on both sides let me get up and bowl without any comments or interference in the 10th. I got my 3 in the 10th for the 280 and that's when everybody came up to me with handshakes, hugs, etc., and I was appreciative of the fact they let me be and never mentioned anything about it until afterwards.

[collinwho]

We never run into issues of people cheering against us in our league, but there is a lot of poking the bear amongst my teammates. For example, if I leave a baby split, one of my teammates might put a dollar down with a "bet you don't pick that up". Before you know it, you have a dollar bet against everyone on your own team if you are going to cover your spare or not. It is all in fun, and no one is ever upset at the end of the night, but it can definitely lead to some interesting optics when a different teams looks over and sees half my team upset because I just picked up a split.

[JasonNJ]

What planet are you from?

Rooting is by it's nature vocal and demonstrative. I admit that it's not very classy to root for something bad to happen to your opponents, and it can often inspire your opponents to kick your butt, but it's part of sports. When I started bowling, if you left a pin rocking, the other team would yell "Stand up you coward!"

I admit that I try to avoid "poking the bears" when I bowl. This is mainly because I don't want to get anyone more fired up to do well against me than they already are. Yet it's sad to think that we've become so politically correct and that our egos have become so fragile that no one is allowed to say anything negative.

Actually if someone yelled Stand up you coward, at least that is funny and I would have appreciated it. For me it depends on the situation and sport. This is a very friendly league and social and usually everyone roots for each other and it's fun. I just didn't expect it and it annoyed me. On the flip side, I played basketball for 20+ years and trash talk never bothered me.

[Aslan]

We never run into issues of people cheering against us in our league, but there is a lot of poking the bear amongst my teammates. For example, if I leave a baby split, one of my teammates might put a dollar down with a "bet you don't pick that up". Before you know it, you have a dollar bet against everyone on your own team if you are going to cover your spare or not. It is all in fun, and no one is ever upset at the end of the night, but it can definitely lead to some interesting optics when a different teams looks over and sees half my team upset because I just picked up a split.

You don't see that as much anymore. People get weird about even mentioning their bowling or how well they are doing...betting against them...I don't know. I had a teammate, very good bowler, that didn't even want to participate in the card game because he didn't want to put undue pressure on himself.

There's no right or wrong answer (nor planet of origin) concerning this topic. Everyone has different tolerance levels for the mental side of the game. I was illustrating that, FOR ME, the other team's antics backfired and led to me having a well above average night. Had they been more familiar with me, or smarter in general, they could have mentally knocked me off my game any number of other ways. Most people on this site would agree that I'm my own worst enemy and am mentally ruining my game the entire time I'm bowling...so it's not very difficult to get me "off my game" (mentally speaking). They just chose one of the few ways that has the opposite effect...FOR ME.

It's all individual. A lot of the old-timers...you don't dare even get near the ball return when they are standing there. Some guys, you don't talk to them when they're having a bad game. Some guys you don't dare give advice to. I've seen more than one old lady at the ball return, counting bowling balls...and if anyone has more than one ball on the rack...welcome to Hell. Everyone has their own tolerance. Most leagues have 1-3 guys that seem to always get drunk and run around the place...or teams that cheer too loud...or teams that take the game too seriously.

I had to stop myself from going to the league President to report a guy using illegal equipment (i.e. Motiv embarrassment)...because the guy was this old timer...not a good bowler...the ball wasn't giving him any real advantage the way he was throwing it...so why be a jerk? The last thing I want is for a guy who bowled all his life to quit because his ball got reported and taken away. He probably has no idea what happened with the Motiv thing. So, I didn't say anything. In a tournament...absolutely I report it. Everything is relative to the level of bowling you are at. Etiquette is probably gonna be absent on "Drunk Thursday" when the college kids show up for $6 bowling and $2 shots. Yet, at a PBA Regional or God forbid a National event...if you, as a competitor, so much as sit on your chair funny...it could lead to an international incident. It's all relative.