negative attitudes on your team (LONG rant)

[panbanger]

When I started this league, I had no expectations at all. Being my first league in over 20 years combined with the fact that I’ve been throwing fingertip with a modern ball for less than a year, I just joined for an excuse to bowl at least once a week. I was placed on a team that needed another member since I knew nobody there.
My team has myself (190 average), another guy who averages about 200, and a husband and wife team who are there purely for fun. She averages 120 and he about 160.

Fast forward 15 weeks in to the season and we find ourselves in 2nd or 3rd place each week. Once in a while we are in first! I totally didn’t expect this. The top teams in our league are teams that consist of 3 scratch bowlers and one person with a handicap of maybe 30 or 40 pins (our league uses 80% of 200). But then there is my team, kind of the “one of these things is not like the other” in the standings lol.

So we reach the halfway point, which is position round. We bowl the first place team and we have our butt’s handed to us on a silver platter with French fried potatoes. On our team, who gets upset about this? Surprise, it’s the two people with the low averages. Never mind that he bowled a 120 and she bowled an 85 or so, they get really upset and have a terrible attitude about halfway through the 2nd game. So by the 3rd game, I just wanna get out of there.

The next week we are somehow still in the top 3 and we manage to go 2-2 that week. We manage by bowling around our average and the other team having a couple bad games. Then this past week, we lose all 4 to a team that’s around 12th place or so (league has 20 teams). The husband and wife team really take it hard as usual. I’m bowling decent but by the 3rd game again I just wanna get out of there.

My point is that I really don’t care if we win or lose. And that was the attitude that the whole team had, until we started winning! And the people who care about winning the most are the people who bowl the worst! ARGH! I actually hope that we drop down a few spots over the next few weeks just to avoid the negative attitudes. Next week we are bowling the 2nd place team (we should be in 4th place I think) and they have 3 scratch bowlers. I would be amazed if we win one game. But the worst part is – I’m thinking of pre-bowling just to avoid the 2 people on my team pouting over our loss.

This is a long rant with no real questions for anyone. But…anyone have anything similar to share? I’m hoping this is just a case of having a couple bad weeks, and our team probably over-achieved in the first half of the season anyway. Now to be fair the husband / wife team aren’t just 2 awful bowlers – he sometimes rolls a 200 or so which is a big boost to the pin total when you average 160. The wife I kind of feel sorry for because the husband will often give her pointers between frames: hold your fingers this way, aim for this arrow etc. She’s there to socialize and have fun above anything else. Which is fine! I just have a thing about giving other bowlers pointers during league especially when they don’t ask for it.

Ok end of rant.

[scottymoney]

Being on a throw together team it has to be tough. As long as they aren't complaining about your game then just ignore them and bowl. If they are so hell bent on winning they need to "put up or shut up", they help the team out with high handicaps but that doesn't help if they can bowl their own averages.

In this situation I would bowl out the season and hope you find a few people around the alley to jump ship and make a new team. Looks like you may only need 2 people as the other guy seems to bowl well and hopefully has no ties to the couple.

[J Anderson]

There are a number of ways to have a negative attitude. One of my teammates back in the 70s would start predicting our defeat in the ninth frame of almost every game, especially if we were ahead. It didn't matter if we were one mark up or ten marks up, Tut would start muttering that we were going to get beaten. The rest of the team was used to this and just ignored it. I think he was just trying to keep the pressure on himself to finish the game strong.

There is a person in this same league who was one of the higher average bowlers back then who is driving his current teammate crazy. He still uses the same technique that he used back in the early 80s. Age has robbed him of what ever speed he had so his ball rolls out 6 to 10 feet before reaching the pins at a speed of 9 to 10 mph. He was never great at making the 10pin and now he's even worse and the 6 pin is doubtful. His teammate will make suggestions about how to make it, and the reply is always "I can't".

The third is the case of self-fulfilling prophesy. I once got an e-mail from a teammate 2 or 3 days before league explaining in detail why he wouldn't be bowing well that week. Needles to say he was 35 pins under average the first game, only hit his average the last game and was a total of 42 under for the night.

[e-tank]

My gf throws a straight ball and will try and blame it on the ball for the reason why its not going straight even though i her than shes throwing it across her body and thats the problem

Other league member will complain that her ball wont strike yet she refuses to adjust anything about her game

[Perrin]

You guys are making me feel really lucky with the throw together team I got put on this year.
me (185 in this league) and then the other guy (~125-130) Girl 1 (~105) and girl 2 (~90-95)

They are all constantly asking for advice and pointers on how to improve and they all have a great attitude about the game.

[scottymoney]

You guys are making me feel really lucky with the throw together team I got put on this year.
me (185 in this league) and then the other guy (~125-130) Girl 1 (~105) and girl 2 (~90-95)

They are all constantly asking for advice and pointers on how to improve and they all have a great attitude about the game.

Attitude is the one thing in bowling that separates people. As long as they show up and are having fun that is what counts. When people ask for help you know they are truly interested and want to get better. I bet you guys carry a pretty big handicap in your league?

[10-in-the-pit]

Yeah, since you don't know them, just ignore them. You can begin working on setting up your own team or joining someone else's. You can try to stay away from them so you don't have to hear their comments, but you're pretty much stuck with what you have.

[wimsical]

I actually have a bit of a problem staying positive if I'm playing bad, though I'm not very loud about it I'm fairly certain it shows on my face and I tend to become a lot more quiet (and I'm not the big talker on the team to begin with). Having said that, I never get angry at other people if they're not playing good and I don't really care if we win, because we play with a fairly low average team in a scratch league.

[Perrin]

Attitude is the one thing in bowling that separates people. As long as they show up and are having fun that is what counts. When people ask for help you know they are truly interested and want to get better. I bet you guys carry a pretty big handicap in your league?

yeah one of the biggest in the league. Handicap is based on team average rather than individual though. To prevent 3 scratch bowlers from grabbing a low average player just for handicap. (them being over the scratch bowling mark will actually take handicap away from the handicap bowler) Unusual system but it works well for this league. (more about fun than bowling honor scores )

[panbanger]

yeah one of the biggest in the league. Handicap is based on team average rather than individual though. To prevent 3 scratch bowlers from grabbing a low average player just for handicap. (them being over the scratch bowling mark will actually take handicap away from the handicap bowler) Unusual system but it works well for this league. (more about fun than bowling honor scores )

I like the sound of that system!