Aslan's Scores (of the non-lady kind)

[Aslan]

So you sat down and typed this while you were hammered with hiccups??

What am I supposed to do hammered with hiccups?? And don't suggest any lady-sensitive activities or you'll make Bowl1820 mad. We're talking about getting hammered....but in a family friendly way and a way that dignifies women. True dat.

Wow, if I had too much at the alley the last thing I feel like doing is expressing my feeling on a website.

Where would you express your feelings? You aren't one of those guys that'll just get naked and sing songs on the overpass and cause traffic problems are you? I may be wasted...but not wasted enough to get tazed over it.

And they weren't "watching" your bowling style, they were "watching" your Charlie Sheen-like shirts.

I was wearing one of my more flashy bowling shirts...so thats a possibility. And as usual, I was looking sexy as hell. So, I see your point.

And, for those enquiring minds that want to know...yes, I was on my bathroom floor at 3:00AM grasping my toilet for dear life...and no, that was not as fun as it sounds. I now remove my endorsement for Bud Ice...it is evil...and cost our team 2 points. I am now banning it from my training regiment.

Sidenote (and standard disclaimers apply): See, THIS is why I need that Heather D'Erricho bowler to fall madly in love with me. I need that constant coaching and mental preparedness that a coach and life partner can offer. She sees that the Bud Ice is negatively affecting my spare game...maybe I cut off the drinks a little earlier...and then make history. But without that voice of reason...I'm left to my own devices...and that almost never ends well.

[bubba809]

I am now 100% in full support of a female bowler (Pro OR non Pro) hooking up with Aslan. Has this man not suffered enough??!!?! A straight shooting dominant woman is what this man needs in his life. You will see his priorities sway. Give him a chance ladies, he has earned it!!

[Aslan]

I am now 100% in full support of a female bowler (Pro OR non Pro) hooking up with Aslan. Has this man not suffered enough??!!?! A straight shooting dominant woman is what this man needs in his life. You will see his priorities sway. Give him a chance ladies, he has earned it!!

See...Bubba gets it. Nobody else gets it, but Bubba...he understands.

[Blacksox1]

I hope that you find this woman before the move to Iowa. CA > IOWA

[classygranny]

but I can't tell for sure since I'm drunk as a $3 whore.

but in a family friendly way and a way that dignifies women.

OXYMORON.... LOL

[NewToBowling]

OXYMORON.... LOL

He's a man whore

[Aslan]

OXYMORON.... LOL

Okay....$4 whore. Gosh...the world is so politically correct. How many $$s is enough to transition from it being a derogatory description to a respectable profession that deserves it's workers to be well paid, medically taken care of, and respected professionally in a safe working environment?? I don't know. Probably more than $3. Maybe $30. Maybe $300. Maybe $3000. I don't know the answers to these macro level questions.

What I DO know...I learn from my surroundings and interactions with others. Appreciating how wonderful and special everyone is and doing my part to enhance their bowling lives....positive...generally. Rating the top 20 most attractive members or assigning a low $ amount to certain professions....generally a negative. I find this route to be longer than my previous plan of deeming what is socially acceptable based on "WWMTD" or "WWDTD" (What Would Mike Tyson Do or What Would Donald Trump Do)...but I feel eventually I will become a "better" person for it. Granted, a far more boring person...but overall "better".

[classygranny]

Okay....$4 whore. Gosh...the world is so politically correct. How many $$s is enough to transition from it being a derogatory description to a respectable profession that deserves it's workers to be well paid, medically taken care of, and respected professionally in a safe working environment?? I don't know. Probably more than $3. Maybe $30. Maybe $300. Maybe $3000. I don't know the answers to these macro level questions.

What I DO know...I learn from my surroundings and interactions with others. Appreciating how wonderful and special everyone is and doing my part to enhance their bowling lives....positive...generally. Rating the top 20 most attractive members or assigning a low $ amount to certain professions....generally a negative. I find this route to be longer than my previous plan of deeming what is socially acceptable based on "WWMTD" or "WWDTD" (What Would Mike Tyson Do or What Would Donald Trump Do)...but I feel eventually I will become a "better" person for it. Granted, a far more boring person...but overall "better".

Whoa...I did put an LOL as I truly thought your posts were funny, yet contradicting.

In answer to your above question, most brothels in NV charge a minimum of $150-$300. Most workers at these legal establishments, thus meeting your requirements above, make about $3K per week.

Forget about being a "better" person, I sorta like you the way you are...at least the online version. Some of your posts can just take my breath away, while some make me laugh out loud. Opening your posts reminds me of Forrest Gump box of chocolates...."you never know what you're going to get". Keep up the good work! But try and relax when you bowl!

[Timmyb]

The posts keep me laughing. As droll as some forums can get, this one by far is the most entertaining I've seen!

[Aslan]

Wednesday League: medium-oil synthetics. Was hoping to play around 8-9 at the dots but had to move outside to 6-7 at the dots. Pretty much straight up and in. I practiced a couple games on a burnt lane just to get my blood pumping and my practice shots out of the way. Didn't keep score though. I was kinda high and forgot.

576 Series: 200-187-189

Game 1 I ran some strikes together in the middle; but I missed a single 10-pin and got the 4-7-10 in the 10th to kinda put a damper on the performance.

Game 2 was a missed single 6-pin away from a Dutch 200. I was kinda excited I might get a 200 triplicate and a Dutch 200 on the same night.

Game 3 was very much like Game 1...a missed 6-10 and a 6-7-10 split...otherwise clean.

PinPal Stats:
First Ball Average: 9.25 pins
Strikes: 50% (1 4-bagger, 1 turkey, and 9 singles)
Spares: 66% picked up

Single Pin spares: 80% (8/10)
Most common single-pin leave: 10-pin (4x)
Never left a single 1-pin, 2-pin, 8-pin, nor 9-pin.

Multiple Pin spares: 40% (2/5)
Most common multi-pin leaves: 6-10 (2x)

Splits: 0% (0/2).

Average over 3 games: 192.00.
Average had I picked up 100% of single pin spare leaves: 199.67.

Hard to be upset when I really only opened a handful of times...and two of those were tough splits. But, not happy about the spare shooting in terms of missing a 6-poin, 10-pin, and 6-10. I can't get to the next level missing easy spares.

My stupid average is now down to 199...198 after tonight. It sucks to bowl so well and still barely help your team if not hurt them by rolling a 187 and 189. But, fortunately we took all 4 points. Probably too little too late at this point...but the season is far from over.