For the coaches/experienced bowlers...how would you coach...

[Amyers]

Very advance but with a funny story

I put a dime on a board at the arrows. Instructions; hit the dime and the pocket. Once she was able to do this 90% of the time I added a quarter at the breakpoint. This was obviously much harder. So here is this tiny teen blowing the snot out of the pins and getting mad as heck. She kept missing the quarter on strikes and not hitting the pocket when she hit the quarter.
At one point she went GRRR and the tips of her ears were turning red. I knew she was mad and why. One of the house shot heroes came over and asked why she was so mad about striking.
"I missed at the breakpoint" she said
"So what, you still struck so what does it matter?"
"Averaging 230 on a house shot doesn't mean squat if I can't average 230 plus on a sport shot. I'm not here to bowl in fun leagues I'm here to try and become the best. In competition you take any strike you can get but in practice the point is to get it right. My alignment is off, I know it and it ticks me off that I haven't figured out the correct alignment for this pattern yet."

Now this jerk keeps running his mouth for a good half hour about what a waste of time it was and being "just a girl" she would never get anywhere. She got fed up, took a 20 out of her wallet and asked if he wanted to bowl. When she started to say what the pattern was he interrupted and said it didn't matter. She beat him 242-173.
Two weeks later we get there and he is practicing, with a piece of tape at the arrows lol

I like that I'm surprised it taught him anything though. He must be smarter than the average house moron most of those would have chalked it up to "bad luck" and went on their way

[billf]

She has been coming in after the Tuesday mens scratch league and bowling pot games and winning quite a bit more than she has lost. I just laugh when the ego bowlers say she wouldn't be able to handle transition. It's like they don't believe there is any transition in the tournaments she bowls even with the boys on the same pair.

[Aslan]

Some people!

I've seen it happen both ways. Same thing in golf.

Thats why in both golf and bowling there is the unspoken rule that if people don't ASK for help; the rule is not to give it.

And thats not easy, especially for men and women. When men hear women complaining (which they do routinely), our (male) natural response is to try and FIX their problem for them. Thats our historic and evolutionary response. The TROUBLE is...women (as pointless as it seems to men)...sometimes just like to complain about stuff...and they don't want men to help them fix it...they just want men to listen and care and say "there, there" and leave it at that.

For those that think the above is just male chauvinistic ramblings by a self-proclaimed womanizer....while you are somewhat correct...realize that the above was actually something I learned reading books about male/female relationships and NOT something I came up with myself. To me, it still makes relatively little sense to be honest.

But I mention it (above) because I run into it in almost EVERY league I play in. There is a person, usually a woman but it can also be a man, that spends the entire game...throwing a 80-150 score...and complaining that they can't figure things out and sometimes they even ask in a general way (not to a specific person), "what am I doing wrong?" It's very difficult, especially for men, especially for people that want to see people do well and enjoy the sport even more; it is very difficult to just smile and ignore that question.

SO...we "help". And I've found that in 95% of the scenarios...they don't listen. They may "try" it...ONCE...and thats it. And it doesn't matter if they are GOOD or BAD bowlers. Both listen equally horribly. I've even told very high average bowlers...about an adjustment I'd recommend...they've DONE it...struck with a perfect pocket hit...then proceeded to not do it again and have a horrible game.

I think theres two reasons for this, but Mark Baker summed it up best during my first lesson with him when he asked about my average and I asked him what was harder to coach, beginners or more advanced bowlers and he gave a long response but during that response he said he doesn't get a lot of bowlers coming to him that average in the 150-180 range. He said that beginners that are bad and want to get better understand the value of lessons. The more advanced bowlers with specific and sometimes lofty goals understand the value of constant improvement and refinement and coaching.

But for most league bowlers in the 150-180 range...every now and then they throw a 220+ game and figure, "I don't need lessons...I just need to throw more games like that one." League bowlers on house patterns...intentionally never leave their home center, they avoid tournaments and sport leagues, and they don't bother to get lessons or do research on bowling...they figure they got it figured out.

So, when you try to help most bowlers...they might try it...then they watch YOU throw a bad shot and immediately think, "well, he isn't that great...so I shouldn't listen to him" or they try whatever you suggest and it "feels different"...so thats all it takes to abandon it and go back to what they used to do...even if it was entirely unsuccessful.

And I've had other bowlers come over and try to "help"...and give horribly ridiculous advice...I've had people just say, "you do whatever is comfortable and ignore all the others" and both irritate me...but at the end of the day...it's not going to matter.

The whole reason I asked the question (besides assistance with potentially getting laid)...is that I have a secret tendency to overthink things....some of you may not know that...but I can't translate my insane approach to a new, casual bowler. I would have the tendency to bombard them with an enormous amount of information. I know thats not going to work. But since I've been trained how to adjust for YOUTH and not ADULTS...I also don't want to go the other direction and start teaching her one-step approaches and stuff that you might "skip" for an adult bowler.

[NYMIKE]

Update us on this, both and and off the lanes.

[Aslan]

Update us on this, both and and off the lanes.

Mudpuppy Cliff Notes Version: Aslan is old, the chick is too hot, reality will eventually set in.

We were supposed to "practice" but she is a server and a young gal and I guess there was some drama with her and her roommates so she moved home and I ended up not being able to do it on Thursday night because I was exhausted and had hockey at 6:30AM the next morning...and of course she has a "life" so she wasn't able to meet Friday/Saturday...so that was that.

The first 2 weeks she seemed kinda into me...these last couple weeks not so much. I think she just likes attention and guys buying her drinks....so a bowling league is a perfect setting for her. But the age gap (14 years) is just too significant. If she was mature for her age...."maybe"? But she's a typical 20 something female that has no idea what she wants or where shes going or anything like that. I'm still keeping the door open "just in case"...because she's cute and has a very appealing personality and a lot of energy...but it's a long shot at this point.

I'd still be interested in coaching her...I think she could average in the 150s with very minimal work...rather than 90-110 games. But...getting a 20 something female to commit to a practice is like trying to catch a fly with tweezers. Not to mention, the younger they are, the harder it is to keep them from being distracted by just about any shiny object or noise...so getting her to show up is one thing....getting her to actually practice (versus constantly wander around getting drinks and visiting)...also a long shot.

[jab5325]

Mudpuppy Cliff Notes Version: Aslan is old, the chick is too hot, reality will eventually set in.

We were supposed to "practice" but she is a server and a young gal and I guess there was some drama with her and her roommates so she moved home and I ended up not being able to do it on Thursday night because I was exhausted and had hockey at 6:30AM the next morning...and of course she has a "life" so she wasn't able to meet Friday/Saturday...so that was that.

The first 2 weeks she seemed kinda into me...these last couple weeks not so much. I think she just likes attention and guys buying her drinks....so a bowling league is a perfect setting for her. But the age gap (14 years) is just too significant. If she was mature for her age...."maybe"? But she's a typical 20 something female that has no idea what she wants or where shes going or anything like that. I'm still keeping the door open "just in case"...because she's cute and has a very appealing personality and a lot of energy...but it's a long shot at this point.

I'd still be interested in coaching her...I think she could average in the 150s with very minimal work...rather than 90-110 games. But...getting a 20 something female to commit to a practice is like trying to catch a fly with tweezers. Not to mention, the younger they are, the harder it is to keep them from being distracted by just about any shiny object or noise...so getting her to show up is one thing....getting her to actually practice (versus constantly wander around getting drinks and visiting)...also a long shot.

Isn't the rule half your age plus 7?

Go for it!

[Tony]

Not to mention, the younger they are, the harder it is to keep them from being distracted by just about any shiny object or noise...so getting her to show up is one thing....getting her to actually practice (versus constantly wander around getting drinks and visiting)...also a long shot.

This is the key, a few (many) drinks and the distraction factor are the best combination for your off the lane options !

[Jessiewoodard57]

Very advance but with a funny story

I put a dime on a board at the arrows. Instructions; hit the dime and the pocket. Once she was able to do this 90% of the time I added a quarter at the breakpoint. This was obviously much harder. So here is this tiny teen blowing the snot out of the pins and getting mad as heck. She kept missing the quarter on strikes and not hitting the pocket when she hit the quarter.
At one point she went GRRR and the tips of her ears were turning red. I knew she was mad and why. One of the house shot heroes came over and asked why she was so mad about striking.
"I missed at the breakpoint" she said
"So what, you still struck so what does it matter?"
"Averaging 230 on a house shot doesn't mean squat if I can't average 230 plus on a sport shot. I'm not here to bowl in fun leagues I'm here to try and become the best. In competition you take any strike you can get but in practice the point is to get it right. My alignment is off, I know it and it ticks me off that I haven't figured out the correct alignment for this pattern yet."

Now this jerk keeps running his mouth for a good half hour about what a waste of time it was and being "just a girl" she would never get anywhere. She got fed up, took a 20 out of her wallet and asked if he wanted to bowl. When she started to say what the pattern was he interrupted and said it didn't matter. She beat him 242-173.
Two weeks later we get there and he is practicing, with a piece of tape at the arrows lol

I'll bet he thinks twice about shooting his mouth off next time . We have this tiny and I do mean tiny maybe 95# young lady throwing a 14# ball like its nothing averaging in the 220s so I can just see this happening.

[Jessiewoodard57]

And I've had other bowlers come over and try to "help"...and give horribly ridiculous advice...I've had people just say, "you do whatever is comfortable and ignore all the others" and both irritate me...but at the end of the day...it's not going to matter.

The only reason I even was trying to help her in the first place is the fact that our team is first in the league. She likes that and hates to lose points. We are up by 10 points with a max of 7 points possible each week. Now for the update she finally was able to put the ball where I suggested and has improved her average this week by 40 pins. She even knew to make a ball change when needed , Proud of her! She is still in the 150 range but getting better.

[Aslan]

Isn't the rule half your age plus 7?

Go for it!

Actually, that rule would put her 1-2 years too young.

Mudpuppy Cliff Notes: Aslan is OLD.