Originally Posted by
Phonetek
In all the years I've dealt with the public I've ran across a lot of people of all types, we all have. Even as a phone man I ran into my share of idiots. In customer service it's expected that you will meet the inappropriately angry people, nice people, complete jerks and stupid people. Last night I met someone who for the first time I actually would have been happy to assault and face the consequences. Luckily I have incredible restraint and am a 100% non-violent. This is BY FAR the stupidest person I've ever met to date.
So this group of 35 people walk in and pile up at the counter. They had Groupons (of course) for two hours of bowling on one lane for 6 people, shoes included and a free pizza and pitcher of soda. It clearly states those specifics. They had 2 Groupons which obviously doubles that. So I redeem the groupons and assign them lanes. Another lane broke down so I had to run in back so I had my counter person give them shoes and get them started. I get back from fixing the lane and they are all down there bowling already. I notice that all but 4 of the 35 are down standing in a ball in the sette area and on the approach.
Being curious, I pulled up the roster to see just how many of them were actually bowling so I could ask the others to move to the tables giving the bowlers room. To my shock they had 14 bowlers on each lane!! WHAT!?! So I asked my counter person, how many shoes did you hand out and did you charge them for them? (With a groupon if anyone EXTRA over 6 people they can bowl free they just need to pay for shoe rental) So my counter person says "No, I didn't charge anyone I just handed out the shoes" Okay, so I have to deal with him later for that because he knows better.
I found the guy who gave me the Groupons and said "Come here dude, we gotta chat." I said "The Groupon only covers 6 people and shoes for 6 people per" He said "The others are just kids" I said "It doesn't matter, it's 6 total people....for the additional you'd have to pay for shoes but they can still bowl" Again he says "They are just kids" I said "Kids count as people" He says "But they are only kids" I said "I understand that but kids are people so if they are bowling you HAVE to pay for shoes" He said "Why? They are kids" I said "Okay, outside of this bowling alley do you consider your kids PEOPLE?" He said "Yes" I said "Then they are still PEOPLE when they walk through the door so, you have to pay for the shoe rental or get them off the lanes" He said, "Okay, I'll delete them then" At this point with my blood pressure already going off the scale I went out for a quick smoke to calm down.
I come back in a tad calmer and decide to go check to see if he deleted the kids. I pull up the roster and he did in fact delete all the names but when I scrolled down now there is a new person simply named "Kids" on each of the two lanes. I took a second the chew on my lip and then went to the guy and said "Come here dude, it appears there was a breakdown of communication" He said "I deleted the kids" I said "No...you deleted their names and then grouped them together. You are obviously not understanding that 6 people means 6 PEOPLE not 6 names plus 8 people in a group on each lane" He looked at me like I was speaking Klingon and said "Yes, but they are only kids"
I was literally starting to shake and I could feel the vein popping out of my forehead. I said "Alright dude I'm gonna break this down one final time....I don't care if they are kids, babies, adults senior citizens, short, fat, tall, skinny or eating Armor hot dogs or aliens from Mars, if they are bowling then you pay the shoe rental end of story! The Groupon covers 6 PEOPLE TOTAL PER LANE!! $60 bucks or I shut the lanes off right now and you can all leave! Understand?" He said "Yes, I understand" then hands me his credit card. I said "Okay, NOW they can all bowl, see how easy that was?" Little did I know it wasn't over yet....
Now his pizza's were done so I bring them to the table and asked him "Okay, what soda do you want for your two free pitchers?" He said "Coke" I said "Both pitchers? He said "Yes" I said "Just to confirm, you want 2 pitchers of Coke?" He said "Yes" I go get the pitchers and set them on the table. A minute later he walks up with one of the full pitchers and says "I'd rather this be Sprite" I said "If you want a pitcher of Sprite that would be $5" He said "No, I want this one to be Sprite" I said "You ordered 2 pitchers of Coke, if you wanted one Coke and one Sprite then you needed to tell me that before you got them delivered to you. I said I double checked with you to confirm you wanted Coke for both pitchers" He said "But I didn't drink it yet so change it to Sprite"
I said "Listen man, if you went to a restaurant and ordered a steak, they put that steak on the table then you tell them....I'd rather have the lobster instead. They will bring you the lobster but your still paying for the steak! Understand? Hence, you want Sprite then your paying for it! I don't care if you drink the Coke or dump it on the floor, you got what you asked for. You want Sprite then $5! I'm not losing money because you changed your mind" He pays the $5 and I give him Sprite. Think it's over yet? Nope!
A few minutes later he comes up and says "I need bumpers" I said "Okay, for which bowler?" He said "For my wife" I said "I'm sorry but we can only give bumpers for people 10yrs old and under" He said "It's for my wife" Here we go again! I said "We ONLY...bumpers....for...people...10 yrs old....and under" He said "But it's for my wife" I said "Is your wife 10 or under?" He said "No" I said "Okay then, NO she CANNOT have bumpers, end of story" and he walked back to his lane.
Again he comes back to the counter and says "I need a smaller ball" I said while pointing to the rack "We have 6lb youth balls right here" He said "No, not lighter balls....smaller ones. They are too big for the kids" I just cringed and said "There are no such thing as SMALLER bowling balls, only lighter or heavier. They are the same size no mater what they weigh. He said "But they are for...." I interrupted him and said "Man, forget it! You can repeat everything as much as you want and nothing is going to change. Now get out of my face and do not come back to this counter again or you can repeat yourself outside in the parking lot cuz I'm about to throw all 35 of you outta here. I've had ENOUGH!" He walked away.
OMG! How does a man reach adult hood with the intelligence of a strawberry? He was obviously trying to get a bunch of stuff for free and I get that. These other questions though, either he was just trying to be annoying which he succeeded with stellar results or he's really that stupid? My other counter person said "I never seen you get that angry, I really thought you were gonna whack him with a pool cue" LOL Now keep in mind, right now I have been walking on air knowing what my future holds so I'm in a great mood. For this guy to make me want to grab him by the belt look and back of the shirt and want to toss him into a pinsetter was seriously an accomplishment. I can only guess how I would have handled it when life was sucking. He should count his blessings. Good thing I have less than a week left.
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